Tuesday, July 14, 2009

Life means

Life means missing expected things and facing unexpected things.
When you are right no one remembers but when you are wrong no one forgets.

Two golden phrases of relationship:-“Don’t believe the doubted one & Don’t doubt the believed one”. That retains any relationship forever…

Three things of life that once gone, never come back:
Time, Words & Opportunity

Three things of life that must not be lost:
Peace, Hope & Honesty.

Three things of life that are most valuable:
Love, Self-confidence & Friends

Three things of life that are never sure:
Dreams, Success & Fortune

Treat everyone with politeness.
Even those who r rude to u.
Not because they r not nice but because you are NICE

About Ahmedabad


The history of Ahmedabad dates back to 11th century when it was

inhabited by Karandev I, the Solanki ruler of Anhilwara (modern Patan). He had

established a city called Karnavati on the banks of the river Sabarmati at the

same location as that of modern Ahmedabad.Solanki ruled Ahmedabad until the 13th

century and thereafter the city was conquered by the Sultanate of Delhi.

In early 15th century, the Muzaffarid dynasty was established in Gujarat.

According to traditions, Sultan Ahmed Shah, while camping on the banks of the

River Sabarmati, saw a hare chasing a dog. This act impressed the Sultan who then

decided to locate the capital of his kingdom here and called it Ahmedabad.

The further development of the city was expanded by Mahmud Begada, the grandson of

Ahmed Shah who fortified the city with an outer wall 10 km (6 miles) in

circumference and consisting of twelve gates, 189 bastions and over 6,000

battlements. Till 1573 Ahmedabad remained under the control of Muzaffarid dynasty.

Gujarat was then conquered by the Mughal emperor Akbar in 1573.

During the Mughal reign, Ahmedabad became one of the Empire's thriving centres of

trade, mainly in textiles, which were exported to as far as Europe. The armies of

the Maratha generals Raghunath Rao and Damaji Gaekwad captured the city and ended

Mughal rule in Ahmedabad. A famine in 1630 and the constant conflicts between the

Peshwa and the Gaekwad armies virtually destroyed many parts of the city, causing

its population to run off. The British East India Company took over the city in

1818 as a part of the conquest of India. A military cantonment was established in

1824 and a municipal government in 1858.

Ahmedabad became the base camp for the Indian freedom movement, when Gandhiji

created an Ashram on the bank of the river Sabarmati. He guided his followers to

intensify the nationalist activities. In 1930, Gandhi initiated the Salt

Satyagraha from Ahmedabad by embarking from his ashram on the famous Dandi Salt

March. The city administration and economic institutions were rendered

functionless by the large masses of people who took to the streets in peaceful

protests in the early 1930s, and again in 1942 during the Quit India movement.

In 1947, India got its independence and the process of reorganization was

initiated by Sardar Patel. Ahmedabad became the capital of the new state of

Gujarat after the bifurcation of the State of Bombay on 1 May 1960. During that

period, a large number of educational and research institutions were founded in

the city which include Indian Institute of Management (IIM) and Space Applications

Centre of the Indian Space Research Organisation (ISRO), making it a major centre

of higher education, science and technology. Today, Ahmedabad is famous from

various aspects like culture, education, industry and many more to rediscover.

1074 - Aashavalli was conquered by Karnadeva who established Karnavati.


1284 - The group of Mandap Durg's Zanzan visited Karnavati.

1297 - Alla Uddin Khalji won Gujarat.


1299 - Alla Uddin Khalji's Army destroyed Doms and Temples of Aashavalli.

1411 - On the banks of Sabarmati River, Sultan Ahmed Shah laid the foundation of

Ahmedabad, Manek Bhuraj (now known as Manek Chowk), Ganeshbari, Bhadra Fort,

Muhurt Pole and Jumma Masjid.

1413 - Construction of Bhadra fort completed.

1423 - Construction of Jumma Masjid completed.

1441 - Death of Sheikh Ahmed Khatu and construction of the historical Sarkhej Roja

begun.

1451 - Houj-E-Kutub or Kankaria Lake constructed.

1453 - Dariakhan Tomb & Dome constructed.

1454 - Construction of Shaking Minarets near Gomtipur.

1486 - Construction of city walls by Mehmud Begda.

1514 - Arrival of Spanish traveler Barbosa and construction of Rani Sipri Masjid.

1535 - Humayun captured Ahmedabad and ruled for nine months. Bahadurshah

recaptured.

1614 - Arrival of the first representative of the British East India Company.

1621 - Shah Jahan constructed Shahibag Palace (presently Commissioner's Bungalow)

and the Shahi Gardern.

1672 - Arrival of English Ambassador Sir Thomas Roe.

1681 - Riots in the city due to famine.

1715 - Hindu-Muslim riot.

1753 - Ahmedabad came under Maratha rule.

1757 - Division of Ahmedabad between Gaikwad and Peshwa.

1758 - Maratha currency introduced.

1818 - Mr. Dunlop, British Collector of Kaira took over the city and thus came the

end of Maratha rule, Union Jack hoisted on Bhadra.

1850 - Construction of Swaminarayan Temple in Dariyapur.

1857 - Ahmedabad Municipality came into existence on 19th January.

1861 - First Textile Mill started by late Mr. Ranchhodlal Chhotalal, the pioneer

of Mill Industry.

1863 - Construction of Railway Station.

1864 - Railway between Ahmedabad and Bombay. Construction of Prem Darwaja.

1897 - Opening ceremony of Gujarat College by Lord Sandhurst. Telephone service

was started.

1915 - Arrival of Mahatma Gandhi.

1916 - Establishment of Satyagrah(Sabarmati) Ashram.

1921 - Gujarat Vidyapeeth, founded by Mahatma Gandhi, Sessions of the Indian

National Congress.

1922 - Arrest of Mahatma Gandhi, sentenced to six years jail for treason.

1927 - Heavy floods. 71 inch Rainfall.

1930 - Gandhiji's historic 'Dandi March' and Salt Satyagraha.

1941 – Communal Riot.

1946 - Second Communal riot. Vasantrav and Rajabali died in riots. Municipality

reinstated.

1947 - Bus Transport Service under Municipal control, Independence Day celebrated.

Tricolour Flag hoisted on Bhadra fort after 130 years.

1948 - Immersion of Mahatmaji's ashes in Sabarmati, Preparations for Electric Grid

Scheme and expansion of Power House, Famine conditions in Ahmedabad District.

1949 - Ahmedabad Station of All India Radio started, Gujarat Chamber of Commerce

established.

1957 - Second General Elections and second Corporation election. Corporation area

extended, new buildings of All India Radio, Divisional Officer's status raised to

Divisional Commissioner with wide powers, Centenary of Himabhai Institute, New Lal

Darwaja Garden laid.

1960 - Constitution of separate Gujarat State on 1st May and Ahmedabad becomes

capital of new state.

1961 - Opening of Indian Institute of Management, National Institute of Design.

1962 - Opening of Nehru Bridge

1966 - Opening of Dr. Vikram Sarabhai Community Science Centre.

1973 - Opening of Shubhash Bridge, Heavy floods in the city.

1986 - 92 sq. km of new area merged with Municipal Corporation on Eastern

Periphery.

2001 - Earthquake on Republic Day (near Bhuj) creates major damage across the

western part of city, leaving over 750 dead and 4000 injured, many of them

residents of tall buildings.


Ahmedabad is located in the northern part of Gujarat, towards the western region

of the country. The city is situated on the banks of the river Sabarmati spanning

over an area of 190.84 sq. km. Its longitude and latitude are 720º 41' E and 230º

1' N respectively and rises to an average height of 50 m above the sea level. It

is the seventh urban conglomeration of India with a population of 4,519,278

persons according to 2001 census.

The river Sabarmati divides Ahmedabad into two physically distinct Geographical

eastern and western regions. The eastern bank of the river constitutes the old

city, which includes the central town of Bhadra. It is packed with bazaars, the

clustered and barricaded pole system of shanty buildings with numerous places of

worship. Some landmark establishments like railway station, the General Post

Office and buildings of the Muzaffarid and British eras are present in this part

of the city.

The western side of Sabarmati is assisted by the construction of Ellis Bridge in

1875 and later with the modern Nehru Bridge. This part of the city houses

educational institutions, modern buildings, well-planned residential areas,

shopping malls, multiplexes and new business districts centred on C. G. Road,

Ashram Road, and more recently, the Sarkhej-Gandhinagar Highway.

Ahmedabad falls under seismic zone-III (a zone having low damage risk), in a scale

of I to V (in order of increasing proneness to earthquakes) while the wind and

cyclone zoning is "very high damage risk", according to United Nations Development

Programme (UNDP) report. The industrial wastes from the textile industries are a

major concern for the civic administration department.

Connectivity

Ahmedabad being one of the most important cities of India is well connected by

air, rail and road.

By Air

The Ahmedabad Airport is just 10 kms from downtown Ellis Bridge/Ashram Road area.

It functions for both domestic and international purpose. Direct Air India and

Indian Airlines flights go to the Gulf, and to other destinations through

intermediate stations.

Domestic flights on Air India, Indian Airlines/Alliance Air, Jet Airways and

Gujarat Airways will take you to Delhi Mumbai, Kolkata, Hyderabad, Bangalore,

Pune, Jaipur and several other destinations inside the country.

By Rail

Ahmedabad has a well maintained railway network connected to important

destinations of the country. Ahmedabad railway station is the largest railway

station in the state of Gujarat. Various express and super fast trains are

available between Ahmedabad and important cities of the country.

By Road

Ahmedabad has a good network of roads also. National highways connect cities like

Vadodara, Rajkot, Jamnagar and Mumbai. The Gujarat State Road Transport

Corporation (GSRTC) runs express and luxury deluxe buses to the neighboring towns

and cities. One can reach the city by taxi from nearby cities.

Natural Resources

Ahmedabad is endowed with abundant supply of natural resources like minerals,

forests and rivers. The principal mineral resource in the city includes crude oil.

The river Sabarmati is the main water resource for the people of Ahmedabad. It

provides drinking water to the entire city. There are two lakes present within the

city's limits — Kankaria Lake and Vastrapur Lake. Kankaria Lake, in the

neighbourhood of Maninagar, is an artificial lake developed by the Sultan of

Delhi. The city’s forest cover is decreasing day by day due rapid

industrialization.


Economy & Industry

The economic development of Ahmedabad largely depends on the trade, commerce and

industries. The skilled human resources and labourers from different parts of

Gujarat and neighboring states are integral to the economy of the city. Ahmedabad

plays a strong and significant role in providing commercial resources and market

access for the economies of neighbouring cities. A majority of the working-age

citizens of the city are traders and businessmen. This has led to the creation of

major mercantile corporations and artisan guilds that are have a key influence on

the economic life of Gujarat. The city's educational and industrial institutions

have attracted students and young skilled workers from all over India.

Ahmedabad is one of the largest industrial hubs of western India, enjoying a

prominent position on the industrial map of the country owing to its importance as

a base of trade, commerce and industry. The city has got its glory as a major

trade destination due to its proximity to the port at Surat. During the reign of

Muzaffarid rule, the city was also a major trade destination in Western India.

In the 19th century the city flourished as a major destination for textile and

petrochemicals. The first Indian textile mill – the Ahmedabad Spinning and Weaving

Company Limited was established by Ranchhodlal Chhotalal on May 30, 1861. This was

followed by the establishment of a series of textile mills such as the Calico

Mills in 1880 by Maganbhai, and mills founded by industrialists such as Ambalal

Sarabhai and Kasturbhai Lalbhai. Arvind Mills, located in the city, is one of the

largest textile mills in the country.

Ahmedabad is equally famous for its chemical and Pharmaceutical industries. Two

largest pharmaceutical companies - Zydus Cadila and Torrent Pharmaceuticals have

their corporate offices at Ahmedabad. Ahmedabad is fifth among the top nine most

competitive cities in the country according to a survey conducted by National

Association of Software and Services Companies (NASSCOM). The Gujarat government

is lifting the development process of Ahmedabad to new height by increasing

investment in the city's infrastructure, providing for the construction of larger

roads and improvements in water supply. The state has a liberal industrial policy

for the establishment of new industrial units in and around the city.


Industry

The Industrial Policy of Gujarat assumes the role of a lighthouse giving

futuristic direction to the process of industrialization. In fact, it also

reflects the commitment of the State towards the achievement of sustainable

industrial development. In the rapidly changing current scenario, it is more than

imperative that the Industrial Policy adopts a pro-active approach rather than a

reactive approach and that Govern - EconomicalLinks q

ment should encourage free market forces to decide the course of development and

to intervene only when the interests of the society in general and investor

community in particular are found to be at peril.

The main objectives of the Industrial Policy of the state of Gujarat are stated as

below:


To create a favorable environment for the investors who would be inspired to think

of Gujarat first for his investment plans thereby enabling Gujarat to emerge as

the most competitive destination for investment in the 21st century.


To equip new entrepreneurs as well as existing enterprises with the latest

information in relevant field(s).


To strengthen the facilitation mechanism at the Government level – both at the

state and district levels.


To sensitize the administration to the needs of the industries.


To implement the concept of e-governance in letter and spirit.


To further strengthen the current mechanism for redressal of
legitimate Grievances.


To develop the best of infrastructure facilities by infusing private sector

investment.


To empower the industrial estates to undertake developmental responsibilities.


To enhance the quality of life in the state, as viewed by investors.


To establish strategic linkages between educational institutions including

universities and the industries to meet with future requirements of manpower, by

introducing appropriate courses.


To take suitable measures for development of human resources through capacity

building and skill up-gradation for enhancement of productivity.


To evolve a conducive business environment by introducing labour reforms


To bring about simplification of rules, regulations and procedural aspects.


To arrest environmental degradation


With Sardar Sarovar Project on Narmada River nearing completion, Gujarat will

witness a boom in agriculture sector and the state plans to capitalize on the

increased agro production to process this wealth into profitable venture by

developing necessary infrastructure.


To strengthen the mature manufacturing segments in the state.


To promote industries which are labour-intensive in nature to create large-scale

employment opportunities in the state


To provide assistance to small-scale industries for healthy growth.


To strengthen existing industrial clusters and promote new clusters.


To assist small and medium industries in getting bank finance.


To inculcate a sense of ‘Quality Consciousness’ by promoting R & D efforts in the

industries.


To assist industries in adopting technology up gradation programmes.


To tailor policies to combat any adverse effect on account of the impact of WTO

regime on various sectors of industries in the State.


To equip the industries in Gujarat to meet with the challenges of WTO regime as

also exploit the opportunities to their advantages.


To assist industries in arresting industrial sickness.


To project and to establish Gujarat as second to none in terms of ‘quality’ and

‘brand image’ of products, on international platform


To ensure adequate supply of natural gas available from Gujarat at competitive

tariffs to the industrial units in Gujarat.


To rationalize tax regime.


To bridge the gap between self-actualization needs of Non-Resident

Indians/Gujaratis and the developmental requirements of the state


To promote port-driven industrialization


To correct regional imbalances


To address developmental aspect of specific issues like Fisheries Development,

empowerment of tribals by creating employment opportunities in their respective

regions and accentuating the developmental pace of Kutch district.

Virgin Joke

Body: virgin girl is on the phone and asks her boyfriend to come

over and have dinner with her parents. Since this is such a

big event, the girl announces to her boyfriend that

after dinner, she would like to go out and make love

for the first time.

* * * * * * * * *

Well, the boy is ecstatic, but he has never had sex

before, so he takes a trip to the pharmacist to get

some condoms. He tells the pharmacist it's his first time and

the pharmacist helps the boy for about an hour.

He tells the boy everything there is to know about condoms and

sex.

* * * * * * * * *

At the register, the pharmacist asks the boy how many

condoms he'd like to buy, a 3-pack, 10-pack, or family

pack. The boy insists on the family pack because he

thinks he will be rather busy, it being his first time and all.

* * * * * * * * *

That night, the boy shows up at the girl's parents

house and meets his girlfriend at the door. "Oh, I'm

so excited for you to meet my parents, come on in!"

* * * * * * * * *

The boy goes inside and is taken to the dinner table

where the girl's parents are seated. The boy quickly

offers to say grace and bows his head.

* * * * * * * * *

A minute passes, and the boy is still deep in prayer,

with his head down.

* * * * * * * * *

10 minutes pass, and still no movement from the boy.

* * * * * * * * *

Finally, after 20 minutes with his head down, the

girlfriend leans over and whispers to the

boyfriend, "I had no idea you were this religious."

* * * * * * * *

The boy turns, and whispers back, "I had no idea your


father was a pharmacist."...................:

Love

1.Lives are for living I live for you
Dreams are for dreaming I dream for you
Hearts are for beating mine beats for you
Angels are for keeping. Can I keep you?

2. You are like the sunshine so warm, you are like sugar, so sweet.... you are

like you... and that's the reason why I love you!

3. You must be a good runner because you are always running in my mind, you

must be a good thief because you have stolen my heart, and i am always a bad

shooter because I Miss You Always...

4. If I had a penny for everytime I thought of you, I'd still miss you, but at

least I would be rich enough to come and see you..!!

5. If I die and go to heaven, I'll put your name on a golden star. So that all

the angels can see, how much you mean to me.

6. I miss you so, here around me, so many people, but yet so alone. I miss your

lips, your lovely smile, I miss you each day more and more!

7. Love is hard and will always be, but remember somebody loves you and that one

is ME !

8. I wanted to send you all my love but the postman said it was too big !

9. If you live to be a hundred , I want to be a hundred minus one day , so I

don't have to live a day without you.

10. There are a lot of birds wispering only about you, you should once listen

to them, then you would know how much I love you.

11. When the night comes, look at the sky. If you see a falling star, don't

wonder why, just make a wish. Trust me, it will come true, 'cause I did it and I

found you!

12. I hope that you finally understand, that I will love you untill the end,

because your not just my girl, you are also my best friend!

13. Kiss me and you will see stars ....Love me and I will give them to you.

14. My love, words however special ... could never even start, to tell you all the

love I have for you within my heart!

15. The day that I'll die, when death replaces birth, I'll recognize angels'

faces, 'cus I live with one on earth.

16. Loving you could take my life, but when I look into your eyes, I know you're

worth that sacrafice!

17. If you were a tear I would never dare to cry. I might lose you!

18. If your heart was a prison, I would like to be sentenced for life.

19. If a big fat man creeps into your bedroom one night and stuffs you into a bag,

Then do not worry 'cause I told Santa I wanted you for christmas!

20. If you are mad at me, you might just as well give me all my kisses back!

21. One day you will ask me: What is more important to you, me or your life? I

will say: my life… You will walk away from me without knowing that YOU ARE MY

LIFE!

22. I have seen angels in the sky, I have seen snowfall in july, I have seen

things u only imAgine to see, But I haven't seen anything sweeter than you.

23.True love is hard to find. Special 1-1 of a kind. But the love inside of me is

true. It appeared the day I met you!

24. I believe that God above created you for me to love. He picked you out from

all the rest cause He knew i'd love you the best!

25. If I died or went somewhere far, I'd write your name on every star so

everyone could look up and see you mean the world to me.

26.I love you not because of who you are, but because of who I am when I am with

you.

27. Who cares whether this is a poem or rhyme, I will love you until the end of

time.

28. Last night I looked up at the stars and matched each one with a reason why

I love you I was doing great, but then I ran out of stars.

29. If you live for 100 more days, then I want to live for 100 more days minus

one so that I'd never have to live without you.

30. They say you only fall in love once, it can't be true. Everytime I look at

you, I fall in love all over again.

31. I get the best feeling in the world when you say hi or even smile at me

because I know, even if its just for a second, that I've crossed your mind.

32.Loved you yesterday, love you still, always have, always will.

33. If there ever comes a day when we can't be together, just know that you are in

my heart. You'll be in there forever!

34.Do you believe in love at first sight? Or should I walk by again?

35.You can fall from the sky, you can fall from a tree, but the best way to fall

is in love with me.

36. If I had a rose for everytime I thought about you Id be walking in a garden

forever.

37.I wrote your name in the sand but the waves washed it away. I wrote your name

on my hand but I washed it the next day. I wrote your name on a paper but I

accidentally threw it away. I wrote your name in my heart and forever it will

stay.

38.If I can only be with you in my dreams then I'll sleep for ever.

39.Sometimes the best things in life are worth waiting for. So wait for me, I'll

be right back.

40. Why is it that I have to climb 1000 mountains to get to you and all you have

to do is smile to get to me?

41. If I got a penny every time I thought of you I'd be a millionaire by tomorrow.

42. If you stood in front of a mirror and held up a dozen roses you would see

the 13 most beautiful things in the world.

43.A day without you is like a day without light because you light up my life.

44. Is it true? Can it be? Are you the only one for me?

45. Tonight I ask the stars above. How I'll ever win your love. What do I

do.What do I say. To turn your angel eyes my way?

46.The shortest word for me is "I"
The sweetest word for me is "love"
The only word for me is "you!"

47. The way you look into my eyes, It scares me
The way you say "I love you", It scares me
The way you know just what to say, It scares me
The ways you scare me, I love it

48. Good days come often, Bad days do too, But the best days only come when I'm

with you.

49. You tripped me, so I fell for you.

50. I will love you until my heart stops beating.

51. If nothing lasts forever, will you be my nothing?

52. I wish I was your blanket, I wish I was your bed, I wish I was your pillow

underneath your head, I want to be around you, I want to hold you tight, and be

the lucky person who kisses you goodnight.

53.Each time I miss you a star falls from the sky, So if you look up at the night

sky and find it dark with no stars, its all your fault, you made me miss you too

much.

54. Words alone will never be able to express the depth of my love for you.
In case you didn't know, I'll be loving you always and forever!

55. Let these words not only touch your eyes, let them travel through your

soul, and let them rest in your heart as you rest in mine…I love you.

56.Falling in love with you was the easiest thing I've done in my life.

57. Hand in hand and heart to heart my love for you shall never part.

58. Loving you makes my heart explode with happiness.

59. Rains fall, winds blow, the sun shines... it all comes naturally, just like

loving you.

60. Bfseing with you is like having every single one of my wishes come true.

61. Loving you has been the best thing to ever happen to me!

62.Just had to let you know... you're the best! I love you!

63. You are the sun in my day, the wind in my sky, the waves in my ocean, and the

beat in my heart.

64.I wish I was there to hold you tight instead of just send this loving, "Good

Night."

65.Thank you for being the one who calms all my inner fears.

66. Just when I thought it couldn't get better, you prove me wrong! I love you!

67.I LOVE YOU 2-DAY
I LOVE YOU 2-MORROW
PUT IT TOGETHER
I LOVE YOU 4-EVER

68.How lucky I am to have known someone who was so hard to say goodbye to.
Love you dear.

69.I'm not the same since i met u, the days turned longer the nights turned colder

and u will always have a special place in my heart just for you. I LOVE YOU

70. Without your LOVE, dayz are "Saddy, Moanday,Tearsday, Wasteday, Thirstday,

Frightday, Shatterday".

71. Words however special... could never even start, to tell you all the love I

have for you within my heart. xXx

72. I feel something in my heart, it's like a little flame, every time I see

you, this flame lights up, this flame is special for you, because I LOVE YOU!....

73.It must have been a rainy day when you were born, but it wasn't really rain,

the sky was crying because it lost its most beautifull angel...!

74. Sometimes words are hard to find, to form that perfect line to let you know

you're always on my mind!

75. If i could give u 1 thing in life, i would give u the ability 2 c yourself

through my eyes, only then would u realise how special u r 2 me!

76.Listed below are the things that I dont like about you:
1.2.3.4.5.6. 7.8.9.10. ..
What can I say? I LOVE everything about U!

77. A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T V W X Y Z
oops! i miss "U"

78. U have been called b4 cupids court 4 stealin my heart, tresspassin in my

dreams and robin me of my senses, uv been sentenced 2 a lifetime with me, how do u

plead?

79. Last night I sent an angel 2 watch over u while u were sleeping but it came

back early! So I asked it why? It said that angels don't watch over other angels!

80. By following my heart I came to you, I only forgot to take something back

with me. For my thoughts are still with you.

81. Roses of red grow in my heart and they will never wither... 'Cause they bloom

every time I see your smile, hear your voice or just think of you!

82. You know what, in the whole world there is no such darling whom I love and

I want the whole world to know that I will never forget you!

83.You are always in my heart, here and everywhere, There is no one in the whole

world that makes me feel this way.

84. They learned me that one hours equals 60 minutes and that one minute equals

60 seconds, but they never told me that one second without you can last for ever!

85. I do not think much, i do not think often, but when I think, I think of

you!

86.Tears in my eyes ......... Tears for you ...... Tears that realise how much I

love you.

87. If a raindrop would mean ... I love you and you would ask me how much I

love you, i bet you that it would …. rain all day !

88. I love you even more than when I started this sentence.

89. I'll love you till the end! And then some more.

90. A day without your love is a day without life.

91. U may be out of my sight, but not out of my heart. U may be out of my reach,

but not out of my mind. I may mean

92. nothing to u, but u'll always be special to me.

93.Someday you'll 4get abt me, ....my name, ...my voice, who I am & who I am 2

you... But even if you 4get abt me, I just wan u to know... I'll never 4get you...

94. So many questions, but the answers are so few, all i really know, is, I

MISS YOU !

95. I may seldom tell u how special u are, i may not be able to reach u coz

we're both busy, but inspite of all, u know u are someone i really miss and care

about.

96.I dont have the measels, i am not confined to bed, asperin wont help coz it

aint my head, i dont have back ache or the flu, its more serious...i am missin u!

97. Ull always be mine 4 now & 4ever.Ull always be mine 4 u r my treasure.Ull

always be mine please tell me its true.Please be mine 4ever ill always luv u.

98. Sweet as a rose bud bright as a star cute as a kitten thats what u

are.bundles of joy sunshine and fun you are everything i luv all rolled into 1.

99. I have liked many but loved very few. yet no-one has been as sweet as u.

I'd stand and wait in the worlds longest queue. just for the pleasure of a moment

with u.

100. A special smile a special face.a special someone i cant replace.i luv u i

always will.uve filled a space no one can fill!

101. I luv ur eyes i luv ur smile.i cherish ur ways i adore ur style. Wot can i

say?ur 1of a kind & 24/7 ur on my mind!

102. As I lie awake in my bed. All sorts of thought run through my head, Like why

do I love you as much as I do. Then I realise its because you are you!

103. I love so much my heart is sure. As time goes on I love you more. Your happy

smile, Your loving face, No one will ever take your place.

104.I hide my tears when I say your name,
but the pain in my heart is stil the same.
Though I smile and seem carefree,
there's no one who misses you more than me!!

105. Is that love i see in your eyes, or merely a reflection of mine?

106. Curved high on a mountain covered in dew... I saw these 3 words... I LOVE

YOU!

107. Fate has brought us together, to meet, to know and to part is the saddest

thing in life... I £ove You...

108. A sMiLe tO pUt You On HiGh... A KisS To Set YoUr SouL ALriGhT... WouLd iT

bE aLriGhT iF I spEnT ToNiTe BeiNg LovED bY YoU???

109. Being near is not the meaning of being dear,
I may be far from u but msgs are bridges
2 make u feel that I always REMEMBER YOU!

Computer Vs. Hindi Films

Computer Vs. Hindi Films:-

1) Pentium III & Pentium I ---- Bade miyan andChhote miyan.

2) Computer infected by Virus - Pyar to Hona hi tha.

3) Hard disk and Floppy disk - Gharwaali Baharwaali.

4)F1 - Guide.

5) Esc - Nau Do Gyarah.

6) Ctrl+Alt+Del - AkhriRastaa.

7) CrtlC + CtrlV - Duplicate.

8) Undo - Aa ab lautchale.

9) Super User Password - Gupt.

10) BackUp - Jaagteraho.

11) UPS - Janta Hawaldar.

12) Server -Godfather.

13) Proxy Server - Padosan.

14) Security -Nakabandi.

15) Storage - Tehkhana.

16) Storage capacity -Badhti ka naam Dadhi.

17) Computer without RAM - KoraKagaz.

18) Computer whose OS is DOS - Buddha mil gaya.

19)System which frequently requires bootable disk - Sharabi.

20) DumbTerminal - Anari.

21) Mouse - Jaanwar

WORDS TO LIVE BY

No man/woman is worth your tears,
and the one who is won't make you cry.
Just because some one doesn't love you the way you want them to,
doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have.

They say love hides behind every corner,
then I must be walking in circles.

A true friend is someone who reaches for your hand
and touches your heart.

The worst way to miss someone is to be sitting right beside them
knowing you can't have them.

Never frown, even when you are sad,
because you never know who is falling in love with your smile.

To the world you may be one person,
but to one person you may be the world

Don't waste your time on a guy/girl,
who isn't willing to waste their time on you

Maybe God wants us to meet a few wrong people
before meeting the right one,
so that when we finally meet that person,
we will know how to be grateful.

There's always going to be people that hurt you
so what you have to do is keep on trusting
and just be more careful about who you trust next time around.

Make yourself a better person and know who you are
before you try to know someone else
and expect them to know you.

Don't try so hard, the best things come when you least expect them!
Don't cry because it is over, smile because it happened.


Have a nice day

Do you know these facts?


  1. If you are right handed, you will tend to chew your food on your right side. If you are left handed, you will tend to chew your food on your left side.
  2. If you stop getting thirsty, you need to drink more water. For when a human body is dehydrated, its thirst mechanism shuts off.
  3. Chewing gum while peeling onions will keep you from crying.
  4. Your tongue is germ free only if it is pink. If it is white there is a thin film of bacteria on it.
  5. The Mercedes-Benz motto is 'Das Beste oder Nichts' meaning 'the best or nothing'.
  6. The Titanic was the first ship to use the SOS signal.
  7. The pupil of the eye expands as much as 45 percent when a person looks at something pleasing.
  8. The average person who stops smoking requires one hour less sleep at night.
  9. Laughing lower levels of stress hormones and strengthen the immune system. Six-year-olds laugh an average of 300 times a day. Adults only laugh 15 to 100 times a day.
  10. The roar that we hear when we place a seashell next to our ear is not the ocean, but rather the sound of blood surging through the veins in the ear.
  11. Dalmatians are born without spots.
  12. Bats always turn left when exiting a cave.
  13. The 'v' in the name of a court case does not stand for 'versus', but for 'and' (in civil proceedings) or 'against' (in criminal proceedings).
  14. Men's shirts have the buttons on the right, but women's shirts have the buttons on the left.
  15. The owl is the only bird to drop its upper eyelid to wink. All other birds raise their lower eyelids.
  16. The reason honey is so easy to digest is that it's already been digested by a bee.
  17. Roosters cannot crow if they cannot extend their necks.
  18. The color blue has a calming effect. It causes the brain to release calming hormones.
  19. Every time you sneeze some of your brain cells die.
  20. Your left lung is smaller than your right lung to make room for your heart.
  21. The verb "cleave" is the only English word with two synonyms which are antonyms of each other: adhere and separate.
  22. When you blush, the lining of your stomach also turns red.
  23. When hippos are upset, their sweat turns red.
  24. The first Harley Davidson motorcycle was built in 1903, and used a tomato can for a carburetor.
  25. The lion that roars in the MGM logo is named Volney.
  26. Google is actually the common name for a number with a million zeros.
  27. Switching letters is called spoonerism. For example, saying jag of Flapan, instead of flag of Japan.
  28. It cost 7 million dollars to build the Titanic and 200 million to make a film about it.
  29. The attachment of the human skin to muscles is what causes dimples
  30. There are 1,792 steps to the top of the Eiffel Tower.
  31. The sound you hear when you crack your knuckles is actually the sound of nitrogen gas bubbles bursting.
  32. Human hair and fingernails continue to grow after death.
  33. It takes about 20 seconds for a red blood cell to circle the whole body.
  34. The plastic things on the end of shoelaces are called aglets.
  35. Most soccer players run 7 miles in a game.
  36. The only part of the body that has no blood supply is the cornea in the eye. It takes in oxygen directly from the air.
  37. Every day 200 million couples make love, 400,000 babies are born, and 140,000 people die.
  38. In most watch advertisements the time displayed on the watch is 10:10 because then the arms frame the brand of the watch (and make it look like it is smiling).
  39. Colgate faced big obstacle marketing toothpaste in Spanish speaking countries. Colgate translates into the command "go hang yourself.”
  40. The only 2 animals that can see behind themselves without turning its head are the rabbit and the parrot.
  41. Intelligent people have more zinc and copper in their hair.
  42. The average person laughs 13 times a day.
  43. Do you know the names of the three wise monkeys? They are: Mizaru (See no evil), Mikazaru (Hear no evil), and Mazaru (Speak no evil).
  44. Women blink nearly twice as much as men.
  45. German Shepherds bite humans more than any other breed of dog.
  46. Large kangaroos cover more than 30 feet with each jump.
  47. Whip makes a cracking sound because its tip moves faster than the speed of sound.
  48. Two animal rights protesters were protesting at the cruelty of sending pigs to a slaughterhouse in Bonn. Suddenly the pigs, all two thousand of them, escaped through a broken fence and stampeded, trampling the two hapless protesters to death.
  49. If a statue in the park of a person on a horse has both front legs in the air, the person died in battle; if the horse has one front leg in the air, the person died as a result of wounds received in battle; if the horse has all four legs on the ground, the person died of natural cause.
  50. The human heart creates enough pressure while pumping to squirt blood 30 feet.

Friday, July 10, 2009

laff for a while

Santa apni girl friend ko I Luv U kehta hai aur gir jata hai.

Gal: Yeh kya kar rahe ho?Santa: I’m falling in love

A man to Santa: Aao ji chess khelein

Santa: Tu chal mein sports shoes pehen kar aaya

Tourist: Whose skeleton is that?

Santa: Tipu’s skeleton.Tourist: Whose that smaller skeleton next to it?

Santa: That was Tipu’s skeleton when he was child

Banta: U cheated me.

Shopkeeper: No, I sold a good radio to u.

Banta: Radio label shows Made in Japan but radio says This is allIndiaRadio!

SARDAR’S BIRTHDAY..
Sardar went for an interview, The question was when is your birthday?
Sardar: 19th january.
Interviewer: which year?
Sardar: Nonsense..Every Year.


Santa: Today is Sunday & I wanna njoy, so I bought 3 movie tickets

Jeeto: Why 3?

Santa: For you and your parents

Boss : Where were you born ?

sardar : Punjab.

Boss : which part ?

sardar : Kya which part ? Whole body born in punjab

apple apple apple

join Laughter challangBanta class mein - madam maine “abc” yaad karli..
Madam -ok ,
to sunao..Banta - abcdefghijklemnopqrstuvwxyz…..
Madam - arey aise nahi ….
aise suna A for apple
Banta - ok madam….
A for apple.
B for bada apple.
C for chhota apple.
D for dusra apple.
E for ek aur apple.
for fokat ka apple.
G for gol apple.
H for hazar apple
I for itney saarey apple?
J for jaao nahi khaani hai apple
K for kaise nahi khaayengey apple
L for lena padhega tumko apple
M for mujhe nahi chahiye itne apple
N for naa nahi kehtey kyunkey yeh hai apple
O for Oh to tumne khaa daale yeh saare apple
P for peth bhar khaao apple
Q for qismat mein nahi hoti hai sabke, yeh apple
R for roz agar khaao tum apple
S for sehetmand rahoge khaaogey agar tum apple
T for tumko nahi milengey itney achey apple
U for udhaar kii nahi hai yeh apple
V for very tasty hai yeh apple
W for waste na karo time aur khaalo jaldi se apple
X for X’mas mei bhii Hi! khana padenge apple
Y for yun na chehra phero dekhkey apple
z for zara sa to khalo apple
plzzzz comment

School life Vs College life

School: 1 colored dress for 100s of days
College: 100 colored dresses for 1 day
School: 2 note books for 1 subject
College: 1 notebook for all subjects
School: white pipe in teacher's hand (chalk)
College: white pipe in student's hand (cigarette)
School: Most frequent letter-Leave letter
College: Most frequent letter - Love letter
School: if we go itz boring
college :if we dont go its boring
SO ENJOY !!!

Rules and principles for students

5 Rules for students
  1. Never make noise in class because it disturbs others who are sleeping
  2. .Be absent to keep campus clean.
  3. Take some fruits for animals in the staff room.
  4. Always take bags because it acts like a pillow.
  5. Never be early to class otherwise no one will notice you...!!!

5 Principles of students life:

  • Love your bed , it is your temple
  • Relax in the day so that you can sleep at night
  • Dont do something omorrow that you can do day after
    tomorrow
  • If you feel like studying sit down and wait till the feeling
    goes away.
  • Dont forget that studying is healthy so leave it for sick
    people.

5 Points to prove that you are a normal student

  1. Unnecessary talk on the phone
  2. Plan each day to study but at the end of the day "kal se pakka"
  3. You have all notes but study one day before the exam.
  4. Right now you are thinking of forwarding this to all your friends.
  5. On each point you smiled because its true..!!!

Why do students fail in exams...?

It's not the fault of the student if he fails, because the year ONLY has 365' days.

Typical academic year for a student

1. Sundays-52, Sundays in a year, you know Sundays are for rest. Days left 313.

2. Summer holidays-50 where weather is very hot and difficult to study. Days left 263.

3. 8 hours daily sleep- 130 days GONE.. Days left 141.

4. 1 hour for daily playing- (good for health) means 15 days. Days left 126.

5. 2 hours daily for food & other delicacies (chewing properly & swallowing)-means 30days. Days left 96.

6. 1 hour for talking (man is a social animal)-means 15 days Days left 81.

7. Exam days- per year at least 35 days. Days left 46.

8. Quarterly, Half yearly and festival (holidays)-40 days. Balance 6 days.

9. For sickness- at least 3 days. Remaining days=3.

10. Movies and functions- at least 2 days. 1 day left.

11. That 1 day is ur birthday. How can you study on your B'day??
Balance = 0 "How can a student pass

Reputed IT companies and their funny full forms

1.NIIT : Not Interested in IT
2. WIPRO : Weak Input, Poor & Rubbish Output
3. HCL : Hidden Costs & Losses
4. TCS : Totally Confusing Solutions
5. INFOSYS :Inferior Offline Systems
6. HUGHES : Highly Useless Graduates Hired for Eating and Sleeping
7. BAAN : Beggars Association and Nerds
8. IBM : Implicitly Boring Machines
9. SATYAM : Sad And Tired Yelling Away Madly
10. PARAM : Puzzled And Ridiculous Array of Microprocessors
11. C-DOT : Coffee During Office Timings
12. AT&T : All Troubles & Terrible
13. CMC : Coffee, Meals and Comfort
14. DEC : Drifting & Exhausted Computers
15. BFL : Brainwash First and Let them go
17. TISL : Totally Inconsistent Systems Ltd.
18. PSI : Peculiar Symptoms of India
19. ORACLE : On-line Romance And Chatting with Lady Employees.

You decide - confused Girls

Girls You decide what we do .............
Men: Then we just go home
Women: You decide
Men: Let take bus, I will accompany you
Women: Bus is dirty and crowded. Don’t want
Men: Ok we will take Taxi
Women: Not worth it… for such a short distance
Men: Alright, then we walk. Take a slow walk
Women: What to walk with empty stomach woh?
Men: Then what you suggest?
Women: You decide
Men: Let’s have dinner first
Women: Whatever…
Men: Eat what?
Women: Anything

Confused aren't they these girls!!!!

Please use your vote

Salary & Govt. Concessions for a Member of Parliament (MP)
Monthly Salary :
12,000
Expense for Constitution per month :10,000
Office expenditure per month :14,000
Traveling concession (Rs. 8 per km) : 48,000( e.g. For a visit from kerala to Delhi & return: 6000 km)
Daily DA TA during parliament meets : 500/day
Charge for 1 class (A/C) in train: Free (For any number of times)(All over India )
Charge for Business Class in flights : Free for 40 trips / year (With wife or P.A.)
Rent for MP hostel at Delhi : Free
Electricity costs at home : Free up to 50,000 units
Local phone call charge : Free up to 1 ,70,000 calls.
TOTAL expense for a MP [having no qualification] per year : 32,00,000 [i.e.. . 2.66 lakh/month]
TOTAL expense for 5 years : 1,60,00,000
For 534 MPs, the expense for 5 years :8,54,40,00,000 (nearly 855 crores)
AND THE PRIME MINISTER IS ASKING THE HIGHLY QUALIFIED, OUT PERFORMING CEOs TO CUT DOWN THEIR SALARIES...
This is how all our tax money is been swallowed and price hike on our regular commodities. .........
And this is the present condition of our country:
855 crores could make their life livable !!
Think of the great democracy we have........ .........


PLEASE FORWARD THIS MESSAGE TO ALL REAL CITIZENS OF INDIA ....

HI FRIENDS VOTING ARE NEAR SO I M REQUESTING YOU FROM MY END FROM ALL OUR INDIA. PLEASE DO VOTE FOR A GOOD AND GREAT LEADER. PLZ DONT WASTE YOUR PRICELESS VOTE ON CORRUPT OR WRONG LEADER.

HUMME SE KISINAKISIKO SHURUAAT KARNI HOGI EK ACHE BHARAT KE LIYE...

Movie titles related to students and exams

Exams: socha na tha,
Classes: kabhi kabhi,
Question papers: Na tum jano na hum,
Copying: Yaarana,
Maths1: Asambhav,
Maths2:Mission impossible,
1st semester: kuch to hai,
2nd semester: yeh kya ho raha hai,
Distinction: Kal ho na ho,
1st class: Raju ban gaya gentleman,
2nd class:Dil mange more,
Fail: Phir milenge..........!!!

BEST OF LUCK FOR YOUR EXAMS EVERYBODY.

What is Love???

Though I am strongly against valentines day but I do believe in love, I think love is very important for existence, from love for parents, children, friends to love for that special someone. I asked some of my friends who are committed in relationships (let me tell you I am single) what is love to them and here are 5 very interesting answers I got

Love is friendship

Love is being someone's everything

Love is heaven

Love is being there for each other no matter what

Love is perfect union of two souls

Funny marriage and love quotes

Marriage has no guarantees. If that is what you're looking for, go live with a car battery.
-- Erma Bombeck

Men only have two faults....What they do, and what they say!
-- Anonymous
Men aren't necessities, they are luxuries.
-- Cher

It is impossible to love and be wise.
-- Francis Bacon

Love is a mutual self-giving which ends in self-recovery.
-- Fulton J. Sheen

Men are from Earth. Women are from Earth. Deal with it.
-- George Carlin

Love is a fire. But whether it is going to warm your heart or burn down your house, you can never tell.
-- Joan Crawford

Trust your husband, adore your husband, and get as much as you can in your own name.
-- Joan Rivers

You have to walk carefully in the beginning of love; the running across fields into your lover's arms can only come later when you're sure they won't laugh if you trip.
-- Jonathan Carroll

If you want to sacrifice the admiration of many men for the criticism of one, go ahead, get married.
-- Katharine Hepburn

True love is like seeing ghosts; we all talk about it, but few of us have ever seen one.
-- La Rochefoucauld

If love is the answer, could you rephrase the question.
-- Lily Tomlin

Love is a grave mental disease.
-- Plato

All marriages are happy. It's trying to live together afterwards that causes all the problems.
-- Shelley Winters

How to wear safety belt

The National Roads Safety Council has done extensive testing on a newly designed seat belt. Results show that accidents can be reduced by as much as 45%when the belt is properly installed.


Correct installation is illustrated below.......




funny safety gagged wife

Make it sure to try it out...

Three funny ways to find if you are ready for marriage

This one is for all those, who have been bluffed by their partners, that they are ready for the Big 'M'. Believe me you can always fool yourself to think that you are, but there are some Scientific Techniques of finding out the truth.

So it's simple now, just follow any of these listed techniques to find if you are ready for marriage, and find it for yourself.

1: The Room Trap Method

Method Summary:
This is a very easy and efficient way to find out. Here's how you can do it.

One fine day enter into your bedroom, take a big iron lock, and lock your room from inside. and then throw the key outside from the window. make sure that you don't have anything of interest with you in the room. No laptops, mobile,etc...

Now if you are able to stay in that room, without any problem, till someone discovers that you have been in that room for last 2 days, without any food, water and entertainment. It means that you are ready to Go!

Else, if you start feeling TRAPPED! and you start crying for help, you want to get out, but you have no key and you feel helpless....then you have got it, it's what the marriage is all about! stay away from it


2: The Credit Card Abuse Method

Method Summary:
On one fine day go to a busy market street, and drop your credit card on the road and you are all set, just come back to home. and sit relaxed for month, and wait for your credit card statement to come.

Now please go through the bill and details of how your credit card got abused. If you can take all this and still smile and are in position to pay the bill, then you are ready! just say those words "I do"

Else please understand that your credit card will be abused like this for the rest of your life, and you will have to take all this with a smile on your face. so think twice before you do the DO!

3: The Chewing Gum Method

Method Summary:
A very simple, quick but effective Method. Go to your nearest super store and buy a single chewing gum. Now put into your mouth and start chewing it, enjoy the sweet flavored juices, which will flow in your mouth for sometime, then the chewing will start turning tasteless, and bland. now you will be tempted to spit the gum and replace with a fresh one. so the real test starts now. You have to keep chewing that gum for the rest of the day. no sweetness, no artificial flavors, no juices, Just a piece of rubber in your mouth.

If you can do it successfully, then the gates of marriage are open and also welcoming you in. Else, some relationships can become like a stale chewing gum, and you have to get used to them, before you get into them.


Hope the above mentioned Methods, will help you to take this important decision of life. These Methods are certified by ISO 2008 Indian Govt Quality Process. Please note that the govt. officials were not bribed to get this done!